The Village I Didn't Go To

Friday, Dec. 12, 2025

Darien Gap

Looks like Alaska or something, right? It's Panama. The air was cool and rainy. A LOVELY day to stay on the ship; a lovely view to admire from a distance!

A great deal happened today. I took part in NONE of it. And I remain absolutely thrilled about that!

We arrived along the shoreline of the Darien Gap by sunrise. You ask—and why wouldn’t you?—what is the Darien Gap? WELL. I’ll tell you! You thought you could drive from far northern Alaska to the tip of Patagonia at the bottom of South America, didn’t you? I certainly did. And in fact you CAN…but just past Panama City, you have to get on a ferry and take a boat to Colombia before you can get back on the road…because there’s this band of IMPENETRABLE jungle in the southern part of Panama…and that’s the gap. It’s not a “gap” as in the open space carved by glaciers between two mountains. No. It’s the fucking GAP IN THE ROAD.

So that’s wild. This is one of the last places in Central America where you really can’t get there from here. It’s not just jungle; it’s also six bazillion rivers and impossibly steep ravines and a few serious poisonous snakes and other things that would gladly kill you.

There are a few indigenous people living in this place. Lindblad had arranged for us to meet members of the Embarà, who were, we were assured, absolutely delighted to welcome us. “The children will take your hand and escort you to the meeting place.”

I’m happy for them—I really am. If they like a boatful of strangers pulling up to gawk at them, then peace be upon them. I didn’t want to be one of the gawkers, no matter how happy the children were. We were all supposed to go ashore and have a “cultural experience,” after which hardier members of the expedition were welcome to walk two and a half miles into the jungle along a “mostly” flat path that crossed three different rivers a total of 19 times. Then there was a waterfall and a pool where we could swim, followed by the walk back. Wear hiking shoes and just accept that you’d be packing soggy hiking boots in the luggage for the flight home day after tomorrow.

Yeah—no. I can miss ALL of that.  Lexie agreed with me, while Twig and Scott wanted the jungle walk. When the sun came up over this gorgeous, hilly landscape, it was missing only one thing, and that was the sun. The day was rainy and grey, with mists and low clouds outlining hidden valleys in the landscape. It was mesmerizingly beautiful, and I was SO very pleased to admire it from inside the air conditioned ship. Twig and Scott set out, and Lexie and I settled in the lounge. Ahhh!

Nice view for a little reading!

The only thing we were sorry to miss was the turtle release. The Embara cared for sea turtle eggs and today they were releasing the turtles to the sea. Cool! But there was no option to watch the turtle launch and then return immediately, so we fought through our disappointment and found seats in the lounge where we could admire the rapid arrival of rain. Lots of rain. How cozy and happy!

Eventually the people who were NOT hiking into the wild began arriving back at the boat, and I know from past experience that what they want to do is come to the lounge and drink. Things get steadily louder. I went to hide in my stateroom, as Lexie did in hers. I read and napped and admired the rainy weather, wriggling my toes in contentment.

Lexie and I had less of an expedition and more of a red snapper po'boy. Winning.

After lunch, Lexie and I went for a “walk” on side-by-side treadmills in the gym. Lexie was the one who came up with The Pirates of Penzance as good walking songs while on the ocean, and we entertained ourselves by seeing how much of the words we could remember. (In the 1980s, Kevin Kline did a movie version, with Linda Ronstadt and Rex Smith that Lexie and I both all-but-memorized.) It was, I think, a good thing that the ship was largely empty as she and I sang loudly and badly for nearly half an hour, entertaining the hell out of ourselves.

Scott and Twig returned, both happy with their experience—even though once it began raining in earnest, the guides made them turn back about half a mile short of the pool because the rain was intense enough to raise the rivers, and wading back across those 19 fords was going to get harder. They said the trail was pretty easy, if often challengingly muddy, and they were both exercised and contented. Plus Twig air-dropped me a few photos, which I present to you here as if I had the skill to take shots so artistic.

The turtle release! Twig says everyone--villagers and cruise ship people alike--stood in a large half-circle to act as the wall against predators before the turtles were tipped out of their box and sent to the sea. Good luck, little guys!

Three sisters. A theme for our journey.

Twig and Scott both got temporary tattoos that should last a few weeks. Neat!

Twig didn't think this was a great photo but I love it. Was the guy in red helping to play that pipe, or what?

Lovely, especially with the reflection. Twig's got a great eye.

What a blissful day. Our last full day is tomorrow and we’re promised birding walks and various activities in a huge nature preserve that used to be cattle farms; the jungle has grown back over the intervening 40 years, but the place still looks fairly civilized. I’m in favor, and am looking forward to it. After all, I’m rested and happy and the wall that one hits when one has had too much? It has receded into the far distance. Bring on the roseate spoonbills and resplendent quetzals!